Haunted by Old Memories
by gabbyromig
Summary: JJ is not as much of an open book as she looks, what happens when old memories come back to haunt her. Will the team be able to help her before her own memories lead to her downfall? JJ and Garcia will eventually be together in this. New to CM fanfiction. Please R&R hope you like it.
1. Chapter 1

**This is my first criminal minds fanfiction but I have written fosters fanfiction for a while so check that out if you like that show. I love criminal minds and debated writing a fanfic for it but something has stopped me but I'm just gonna go for it. I hope you enjoy. **

JJ

I looked at picture after picture and felt nauseous so I put the pictures down and went to the bathroom. I splashed some water on my face and successfully drenched myself because it's that kind of day.

"Shit" I said and got some paper towels to get the water off my clothes.

"Oh my sweet gumdrop that never works" she said and I laughed as she went too drying the water off me.

"What's wrong? You seem off" she said and I sighed.

"I'm fine, PG. Just a long day" I said but she didn't believe me.

"You look sick" she said and I sighed.

"Just those pictures… get too me sometimes" I said and she nodded sadly.

"Did you look in your drawer of fun?" she asked and I laughed.

"Yes Garcia, always" I said and she laughed but soon got serious.

"You're not preg-" she said and I cut her off.

"No i'm not pregnant, Penny I swear" I said and she smiled. _I would have to be straight too be pregnant_ I thought but didn't say out loud.

"Ok fine. Who would be the baby daddy if you were though" she asked trying to figure out who I'm seeing even though I'm not seeing anyone.

"I'm not seeing anyone, Garcia" I said and she groaned.  
"You are telling me you never date" she said and I rolled my eyes.

"I do just not now" I said and she sighed in surrender.

"Fine name three boys you have dated in the last few years" she said and I decided to joke with her.

"Fine; Spencer Reid, Aaron Hotchner, and none other than your chocolate god" I joked and her eyes got big.

"You better not have sister" she said and I laughed.

"I didn't relax" I said not wanting her to attack me.

"Wait did you really date Reid and Hotch?" she asked and I laughed.

"What do you think? I have to get back to work" I said loving that I made her confused.

I sat down on the chair and ran my thumb against the necklace. I miss her so much. She was the person I could talk too about anything with and I haven't had someone like that since she passed away.

She was the only one that knew what happened before Rossi found us. Before we were taken in by the Jarreau's. Not even Rossi knows i'm the kid he saved all those years back. Since I changed my name he hasn't even thought for a second that I'm the kid he carried out of that house over thirty years ago.

Thirty years? I knew this day would come but I never thought I would see the day that they get out on parole.

My phone buzzed to life and I saw that it was my mom.

"I'm fine" I said before even saying hello because I know what she is calling for.

"I know honey. Just wanted to talk too my daughter" she said and I sighed.

"Ok sorry mom" I said and she laughed.

"Take it easy today" she said and I sighed.

"I'm fine mom. It's just another day." I said and she sighed.

"Ok babe, but if you need me let me know" she said.

"Alright mom" I said and hung up.

The next day we were called out for a case in Pennsylvania and I tried to act like it was nothing. It's ridiculous to believe that i will run into either one of them their. It's a state it's pretty big, but it is in a town right outside the town I was rescued in. I just hope he doesn't know I'm in town or that he fled to Canada once released or something.

"Hey isn't this your hometown?" Morgan asked.

"No but a town ten minutes away is." I said and he nodded.

"Go get some free food at your moms house?" he joked and I nodded.

"I don't know about you but I am, my mom is making it mandatory." I said and he laughed.

"I haven't had homemade food in forever" he said and I laughed.

"I'm sure you can come." I said knowing she will invite them when I come.

"Awesome." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"Ok lets review the case." he said and I sighed.

"Natalie Connor, six, and Kristy Connor, 8, were kidnapped from their hometown of Millvale yesterday at eight in the morning. Police were suspicious that their father Adam Conner was responsible because he lost custody due to his drinking a year earlier. They haven't completely ruled him out but they believe it could be the man responsible for the disappearance of Alexis and Sarah Davison a few weeks prior…" I started handing out pictures of the girls.

"Do they know who took Alexis and Sarah?" Morgan asked.

"No, and lucky for us they don't even have a lead." I said and they groaned.

"Great why do they think it's the same guy?" Emily asked.

"Well across Pennsylvania there has been a series of sisters kidnapped that looked very similar to each other. One girl being eight and one being six in all cases, not too mention their was a note found at the victims house each time." I continued.

"Ransom?" Reid asked.

"No, the notes weren't demanding money but where saying the exact way and time the girls will be killed." I said and it sent chills down my spine. Being told exactly how and what time you're kids would be killed has to be enough to make anyone crazy.

"Where any of the girls bodies found?" Hotch asked.

"No thats what's weird he's either not killing them or hiding the bodies well…" I said.

"Or keeping them" Rossi said and I looked away disgusted.

"Ok when we get there Reid and Prentiss go to the house of the Conners and talk to the parents, Morgan and Rossi talk too the Davisons, JJ talk to the police about how they have handled the press, and I will figure out what parents of the other victims will be willing to talk to us." he said and we all nodded.

We got there and we all split up too do our jobs. The police hasn't reported much to the press so at least thats good.

By the end of the day we have talked too most of the victims parents, started putting together a statement and talked to Adam Conner interviewing him. He seems genuinely concerned for his kids but that doesn't mean he didn't do it. Like always during a case the day was long and tiring as we all tried to do the best we can to bring home these girls.

We have Garcia looking into men who have lost a six year old and an eight year old daughter in anyway recently. Within the state of PA there are a lot so that list wasn't much help right now.

Hotch sent us back to our rooms to sleep but there's no way I'm sleeping tonight. With this case on my mind and worrying about them finding me their is no way I'm getting any sleep.

_I watched as he yelled at me and tried not to start crying. _

"_What's wrong with you, huh? You worthless shit" he screamed as he hit my face._

"_I'm sorry,daddy" I said. _

"_Sorry? You're sorry. For what messing up like always. Huh? You're not good at anything. How do you think you're gonna go anywhere in life? You're just as dumb as your sister" he screamed as he hit me again. _

"_Cry and I will give you something to cry for, you bitch" he yelled as my sister came out screaming at him. She always stood up for me even if it meant handling the punishment herself._

I woke up startled from the dream and tried to swallow the lump in my throat as I wiped the tears from my eyes. I jumped in the shower even though it's only five in the morning and tried to calm myself down. All I have to do is get though this case and It's all done. I told myself but I have a feeling thats going too be a lot easier said than done.

**Please review and let me know what you think. I strive for originality (and good characterization) so hopefully this hasn't been done, I haven't seen one yet but hey maybe I missed it. Also what was the name of JJs sister that gave her the necklace before committing suicide I can't remember. My stories can become depressing and weird just a warning, hope you like it anyway.**


	2. Chapter 2

JJ

We continued to work on the case and finally we got a lead. Morgan is going to interrogate him while everyone else continues to work on trying to find the girls. I have been ordered not to release a press conference after receiving a note from the guy saying he will kill them all if we do. We aren't far enough into the case to release one anyways.

"Whos the lead?" I asked and looked into the interrogation room. What I saw shocked me. There's no way. I have to be dreaming.

"He's our lead?" I asked and they nodded.

"Yeah do you know him?" Hotch asked and I shook my head, no.

"No never saw him before" I said hoping not to sound defensive. There's no way he found me.

"I know him" Rossi said sounding pissed.

"You do?" Hotch asked Rossi.

"I arrested him before." he said. _Yeah saving me. _I thought but didn't dare say out loud. That definitely needs to stay a secret.

Morgan came out and looked at me.

"He will only talk to you" he said shocked. Great this day isn't going bad enough. I forced a smile and pretended that I'm not on the verge of a panic attack.

_Deep breaths in and out _I repeatedly said in my head hoping to calm myself down.

"Well if it isn't Alex, I have been waiting for this day forever" he said sending chills down my spine. I went to talk but the words wouldn't come out.

"Cat got your tongue, princess" he said and I couldn't do it anymore I got up and left. I walked past the team and ignoring them calling after me headed to the girls bathroom.

_Cat got your tongue, princess _was what he would say to me when I had trouble speaking as a kid. I was developmentally slow at speaking, ironic now i'm a media liaison, as a kid and couldn't really speak right until almost four years old.

_He's just taunting you don't let him win _I told myself as I tried too slow my breathing and calm myself down. I can't start having panic attacks now, we need to save those girls.

Rossi

All the sudden something hit me that should have many years ago. It was JJ all this time. How?

"Whos Alex?" Reid asked.

"One of his two first victims, the younger one. Her name was Alex Newheart…" I started and they looked confused.

"Why would he call JJ…?" Morgan started confused.

"I saved Alex and her sister Rachel from their abusive parents over thirty years ago. This is them" I said showing them a picture of them from my wallet.

"They look like the victims now blonde hair blue eyes" Emily pointed out as I looked at the picture of the younger girl. Thats JJ, how did I miss it.

"Why did he call JJ that through?" Emily asked.

"Because she's Alex" I said and they looked at me shocked.

"What?" Hotch asked.

"She changed her name after being adopted I guess but she's definitely Alex. Look at the picture" I said handing it to them. Hotch sighed.

"Yeah thats our girl" Morgan said running hand over his bald head.

"Ok Emily go make sure JJ is ok, Rossi interrogate him and get him to talk. We need to know where those girls are. Morgan have Penny look into JJs case and see if she can find anything out that might help us find those girls. Reid look over evidence again. The second we can we need to be talking too JJ about what happened we will see who she is willing to talk too the most." he said and we all went off too do our own thing. This guy will tell us where those girls are if it's the last thing he does.

Emily

Oh my god that was the last thing I expected. JJ was really his daughter? She was abused, who knows what all happened in that house before Rossi stopped him.

"JJ?" I asked peeking my head in and she smiled at me. It was obviously faked.

"I'm sorry I don't know what happened back there" she said and I nodded.

"Are you ok?" I asked and she nodded.

"Yeah of course. It's just… long day" she said and I nodded.

"Why didn't you tell us?" I asked and she looked at me innocently.

"Tell you what?" she asked and I know she's desperately trying to keep ahold of her coverup. She really doesn't want us to know.

"That you're Alex" I said and I saw the look of devastation go across her face.

"Alex?" she asked as if stalling me trying to buy herself some time.

"JJ I don't know what happened to you in that house and I'm sorry that it happened but there are girls who need us. We might be able to find them with your help" I said and she just nodded.

"Good you ready" I asked and lead her out of the bathroom and into our room.

JJ

"Do you care which one of us you talk too?" Hotch asked and I know he's doing his best to make this easy on me. Honestly I would prefer to talk too Garcia since I'm closer to her but she's not here. I have always been really close to her since I met her and if I would have told anyways what happened it would be her.

I sighed I would still rather talk to a girl.

"Emily" I said under my breath and she nodded.

"You got it?" Hotch asked her and she nodded.

"Of course" she said and the rest of the team left.

"Uh… I was six when Rossi rescued me and my sister who was eight…" I started and she nodded.

"He was actually working on a case where a couple of young boys were missing and he was the lead even though he didn't do it. They got a search warrant and when they searched the house they found me and my sister tied up in the attic." I explained and she looked at me shocked.

"I'm sorry" she said and I forced a smile.

"So you changed your name after getting adopted?" she asked and I nodded.

"Yeah my mom changed both of our names so that if he got out for some reason he wouldn't be able to find us. It was like a clean start you know" I said and she nodded.

"Where did you live?" she asked.

"Uh… some house in the middle of this town. I can't remember" I said honestly and she smiled.

"It's fine, Garcia probably already has the address." she said and I laughed.

"Probably…"

"I hate to have to ask but what happened…" she said and I nodded.

"It's ok… him and my birth mom where abusive. If me or my sister didn't do something right not only would he hurt us but he would lock us in the attic without food or water for as long as he wanted pretty much. He um never raped me necessarily but I'm sure he raped her…" I said and she looked horrified.

"Did he ever…" she said and I continued.

"He didn't rape me but he once made me shower with him" I admitted not making eye contact.

"What did your birth mom do?" she asked.

"Told us we deserved it" I said and she looked pissed.  
"Anything else…?" she said trailing off. We have all seen terrible cases where people are tortured or rape or murdered or all of the above but it still always affects us. I'm sure it's worse when you know the person personally.

"Not that I can think of" I said and she nodded.

"Ok let me know if you think of anything else" She said and I nodded. I followed her out too the rest of the team.

"Uh… what do you want me too do?" I asked.

"Go back to your room." he said.

"There are girls out there that need us. I'm not just going to go home." I yelled at him and he looked at me shocked.

"Do you honestly think you can handle this case?"he asked.

"I'm fine. I can handle it. I don't need to be babied" I argued honestly and he sighed.

"Change your mind just tell me, go get a press conference ready" he said shocking me.

"Press conference? Isn't he the guy?" I asked.

"No he just got out of jail he had to have someone else doing the work for him while he was in jail. Hopefully if we find him we can find the girls"he said and I nodded. I went off to start the press conference. I gave the press conference with my necklace in my hand the entire time. It give me a sense of comfort touching the necklace.

"So we believe Adam Newhart had someone working for him while he was in jail?" the one man asked.

"Yes."

"What is the BAU doing too bring back those girls?" One man asked angrily.

"No more questions" I said and ducked out.

Soon after finishing the conference my phone started ringing, Garcia. Yeah of course someone told her what happened.

"Are you ok, gumdrop. I heard what happened." she said.

"I'm fine, Penny." I said and she sighed.

"Don't lie to me. Morgan told me everything." she said and I groaned.

"Why didn't you tell me? You can't keep that stuff too yourself" she said and I laughed humorlessly.

"I did just fine for a while." I said and she groaned.

"You don't keep things from me. I feel like I don't even know you and we have been friends for five years" she said sounding like a girlfriend.

"Ok i'm sorry tell you what. On the plane ride home you can ask me twenty _appropriate_ questions and I have to answer" I said and she laughed. I exaggerated appropriate because I'm on a plane with our co-workers and I don't want to answer sex questions.

"Oh you are going to regret that, I can't wait" she said and I groaned. What did I just sign myself up for.

**Let me know what you think. Is this going too fast? I can't tell. Oh well review please. **


	3. Chapter 3

JJ

The rest of the case went by pretty fast. We got a list of people who visited Adam in prison and since the list was short it didn't take long. Garcia ran background checks on the guys so it goes without saying we found him pretty quickly. The assholes helper name is Eric Crueger and he abducted all of the fourteen girls that are missing. Once we got him, him and Adam sent us on a wild goose chase trying too find the girls. The sent us too like ten different places within a thirty minute circle around the town. We finally found all of the girls, alive, held captive in the old attic I was held in.

"Are you ok?" Morgan asked me. _Yeah not having terrible flashback from the worst part of my life or anything but you know… I'm ok._

"Yeah I'm fine, lets get these girls out of here." I said and we got all fourteen girls out safely. Some of the girls that have been missing for a while where passed out from lack of food and water. We called all the parents and let them know we found their girls and they are alive. We got them all too an ambulance and I'm just thankful that all of them made it out alive and hopefully in decent enough health too make it though.

We finally got back on the plane too go home and I took a second just too relax. This case has effected me more than I would like too admit. I have had nightmares for like three days now and the lack of sleep is starting too get too me. Hopefully it's just the case and the nightmares will stop.

"You ok, JJ?" Morgan asked and I smiled at him.

"Yeah I'm fine, just tired and dreading this call too Garcia" I admitted and he laughed.

"Yeah that wasn't you're smartest idea" he said and I nodded deciding too just get this over with.

"Hey Pen, we are on our way back" I said.

"I know I was just going too call. I was starting too think you where trying too get out of this"she said and I laughed.

"No I know better I don't want too know what you could find out about me on those computers of yours" I said and both her and Morgan laughed.

"Yes and don't you forget the power I have." she joked and I rolled my eyes.

"Ok lets get started. Did you actually date Reid or Hotch?" she asked I laughed. I knew she would ask that.

"No I knew It was killing you" I said.

"Ok good and don't you ever think of getting with my…" she started and I laughed cutting her off.

"You're chocolate god, I got Garcia" I said and Morgan raised an eyebrow at me. He knows we are talking about him but is confused on what.

"Ok good. He's off limits. Do you have a crush on any of the sexy male BAU agents we work with all the time" she joked and I just shook my head and I sighed. So stereotypical of her.

"No Penny, believe it or not I don't" I said honestly. I'm so glad she bothered too specify male because I have a bit of a crush on both my female coworkers, too be honest, especially her.

"I don't believe you buttercup" she said and I groaned.

"I really don't, next question" I said and she sighed.

"Fine. Who do you have a crush on?" she said and I bit my lip trying too figure out what too say. I knew this question would happen and tried too think of how too answer without saying you. So far I haven't come up with one.

"Uh sorry Pen. My phone is going too die" I lied and I know she's sees right though it.

"Yeah right don't you dare hang up…" she said and I ended the call and turned my phone off. Well that was childish.

Penny

JJ has never been much of an open book which kills me. We have been friends for years now and I don't even know who would be her type. She claims she dates but I haven't heard her speak of any boyfriends. How am I suppose too set her up, because she so desperately needs too date, if I don't know who she likes.

On top of all that she kept who she was from me. Her birth name is Alex Newhart? She was abused in all way possible by both her parents before Rossi found her tied up in her attic at sixth years old, like what? She needs too have someone too talk too about that with and since her sister, the only person who could relate too exactly what she was though, has died she needs someone else. Maybe even therapy or something but keeping it a secret can't possibly be good for her.

Why is she so insistant on keeping so much of her life a secret? I'm Garcia, I'm suppose too know. Doesn't she know she can talk about anything with me?

Than she goes and hung up when I ask who her crush is. Why must everything be a secret? Could it be Morgan? Maybe she doesn't want too admit she likes him because she thinks I like him. She doesn't want too ruin a friendship or something. Yeah thats probably it. Thats the only thing that makes sense.

Once they got back too Quantico I went over too talk too them. JJ didn't make eye contact and I sighed.  
"How was the case, my sexy crimefighters" I said and Morgan laughed.

"Oh very sexy" Morgan said and I smiled at him.

"Oh I know my sweet hot chocolate, but right now I need too talk too our sexy media liason" I said and she finally met my gaze. She sighed.

"Come on, we have very personal not profiler stuff too discuss before we retire for the night" I said and she nodded like a kid getting sent too the principals office.

"Have fun" Morgan said jokingly as I looped arms with her and took her back too my lair.

"Now would you care too explain why you hung up during our little interview?" I asked and she sighed.

"My phone died" She said and I sighed.

"Ok I know better my sweets. You can tell me I'm not going too be mad if it's Morgan" I said and she looked at me shocked.

"Morgan?" she asked and by the truly shocked look on her face I could tell I was wrong by my previous thought.

"No Garcia, he's all you're really" she said and I looked at her puzzled.

"Is it Hotch? I won't tell if it is" I said and she groaned.

"It's not Hotch" she said almost annoyed.

"Reid?" I asked.

"Not it's not one of the guys…" she said and I tried too think of other guys it could be.

"Oh is it that… Kyle guy that works for the other team" I said and she groaned.  
"It's not a guy" she screamed shocking me. All the years I have known her and I'm just figuring this out now?  
"You know you could have just said something years ago" I said and she sighed almost of relief.

"Buttercup, I couldn't care less who you sleep with" I said and she laughed as I pulled her into a hug. After a few seconds I hit her.

"Oww what was that for" she asked.

"Not telling me sooner. So you like any of our female co-workers?" I asked and she blushed.

"Is it Emily? I wouldn't blame you she's pretty hot" I joked and she rolled her eyes.

"What isn't she?" I asked and she laughed.

"Yes she is, it's just how you said it." she said and I laughed.

"Oh does someone have a crush?" I asked and she rolled her eyes.

"Penny" she said annoyed.

"You should make a move, her sexuality is questionable" I said and she shook her head.

"No she's straight I'm the only one on the team thats gay" she said without a doubt in her mind.  
"Well don't you put a lot of faith in you're gaydar. What if I told you I'm a lesbian" I said jokingly and she laughed.

"Oh right. What the most you did with a girl?" she asked and I laughed.

"I will have you know I have kissed many girls" I said and she rolled her eyes.

"So what majority of straight girls have kissed at least one girl before. You're straight Pen" She said and I laughed.

"Ok fine. So are you out too you're family?" I asked.

"Yeah but only because the girl I was dating didn't want too hide it" she said and It was weird too hear. Girl I was dating she says it so casually. It's still weird too picture her with a girl.

"So you're not dating right now?" I asked too clearify.

"Nope playing it single for a bit. The lesbian dating scene is a little annoying sometimes" she said and I nodded.

"How do you find a date?" I asked and she looked at me weird.

"Oh haven't you heard they opened a store that sells single lesbians? I don't know how do you find a date. You slowly meet other lesbians and get part of the community and get lucky or if you're brave go too a gay bar or something" she said and I laughed.  
"So it's really hard" I said and she nodded.

JJ

Great I was hoping to keep the lesbian thing a secret. Especially from the one a like, I know it's childish but I have lost to many friends this way. Garcia is my best friend and I don't want to lose her. So far she has taken it well but she won't once she realizes I like her. Straight girls never do, trust me I have been through it to many times. You would think by now I would learn to crush on straight girls but hey it's hard to control your feelings.

"Yeah why do you think i'm signal" I said and she laughed.

"Don't keep things from me" she said seriously.

"Of course, you do realize you sound like a girlfriend right?" I joked but she seriously does.

"I don't care, you don't have one too yell at you for it. You need to talk about this stuff or you will end up going crazy." she said and I rolled my eyes.

"Gee thanks. I have done it for like thirty years and I'm not crazy yet" I said and she laughed.

"Well it's questionable" she said and I rolled my eyes.

"I won't but I think I deserve too do the twenty question thing too you" I said and she shook her head.

"Are you kidding me, gum drop? You haven't even finished mine. If you answer the next 18 questions than I will answer you're twenty" she said and I groaned.

"Ok never mind" I said and she laughed.

"Yeah when you do get yourself a shorty…" she started and I laughed.

"Shorty?" I asked laughing at it.

"When you do get yourself a girl i'm the first to interview her" she said not even caring that i interrupted her.

"Fine, but you have to promise me this stays between us. Not even Emily knows" I said making sure she doesn't think of it as a 'don't tell the boys' secret where she can still tell Em.

"Oh I see you don't want your crush too know" she said and I rolled my eyes. If only she knew she was my crush and that I wish she would be my 'shorty'.

**Please review, I can't tell what I'm doing right or wrong without legit feedback. Let me know what you think, please. **


End file.
